Mary Kate Danahur
That saucy redhead from Inis Free! Mary Kate is a Taurus. Her favorite
color is cranberry, and her favorite flowers are lupins. Turn-ons
include bulging pockets—yes, both kinds—and a freshly opened bottle of
whiskey. Turn-offs are open, running sores, in-laws, and an empty
bottle of whiskey. Born a farmer's daughter, Mary Kate soon found that
her way to riches wouldn't be steering a plow, but rather a
plowboy...and any other man who falls victim to her considerable charms
(although not so considerable as her best friend, Heather MacDonald).
She hopes you'll come to visit, she hopes you enjoy her ditties, and
most of all she hopes you'll give freely to the Poor Orphaned
Children's Whisky Fund. Watch the pendant!
Heather MacDonald
Born in Glencoe to humble farmers, Heather grew up herding sheep and
wee hieland coos (that's "cows" for you illiterate wretches!). Her
father taught her the first words she ever spoke: usice beatha,
Gaelic for "the water of life" (conventionally known as whisky). She
prefers her men regimental and woad-free (again, for those of you who
know nothing at all, woad is that stupid blue paint that you boys
insist on wearing to prove you're William Wallace. It won't come out of
my knickers...and yes, I wear knickers on occasion). Heather's dream is
to share her bounteous charms with the world through ribald songs with
her best friend Mary Kate, and to earn money for the Poor Homeless
Puppies and Kittens Whisky Fund. Watch the pendant!